Preston’s Question

                                                      John 14: 27

 

 

          As you know, I normally color between the lines. That is, I see the sermon as a brief opportunity to remind myself and others of the gospel story. It cannot be told enough. It cannot be overemphasized. It is by far the most important message ever told. And so that is my concentration. But there are times, and today is one of them, when I feel compelled to stretch that fabric to deal with an issue that should be discussed. So forgive me if this message seems to stray. I believe by its end, it may yet find itself part of that gospel message so elemental to Christian beliefs. As this story unfolds, you will all know the players involved, but please realize they could be any of us. This was an exchange that is and will be taking place all over America is the coming months and years.

          The other day, I went over to visit a bit with a church member. We sat in rocking chairs on the front porch and just took a little while to catch up. I was about to start for home and he was taking a break from outside chores on a very hot day. While we were visiting, we were joined by another church member and his son, a curious and engaging fellow who will soon enter the 3rd grade. As we talked, the conversation began to split.  The two church members talked and I began to listen to my friend Preston. He had some questions he needed to talk about. Questions about creation and about dinosaurs and about time. It was a theological challenge to keep up.

          Things moved along and I felt that I was holding my own with Preston. Then his questions began to take a new turn. He asked me if it was okay that he had friends who were boys. He told me he really liked boys, that he really had a lot in common with boys and they were fun to play with. He asked me if that was all right. I told him that was of course all right. Then he said that he had heard grownups talking about boys marrying boys and girls marrying girls. He said as much as he liked boys, he didn’t want to marry one. He said that when it came to things like that, he liked girls a whole lot more. I assured him that not only did I think he had the right idea, but that I felt the same way myself.

          I don’t think he noticed, but I did. The other conversation had stopped. Everyone was listening to an eight year old explain what was normal. He wanted to know what the Bible said about such things. He wanted to do the right thing. I told him the Bible was pretty much right where he was and he didn’t need to change a thing.

         He doesn’t need to change a thing. But we do. Our culture has moved. It seems as if the earth has moved right under our feet. The Supreme Court of the land has legalized same gender marriage. Perhaps of even greater importance is the fact that as of this moment, same sex marriage has been sanctioned by such mainline churches in America as the Evangelical Lutheran Church, the Episcopal Church, the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.), the Quakers, the United Church of Christ, both the Reformed and Conservative Jewish Movements and several others. According to a recent survey by the Pew Foundation, a solid majority of white mainline Protestants (62%) now favor allowing same gender marriage. A similar share say there is “no conflict” between their religious beliefs and homosexuality.

          Preston was worried that he might have to be careful about liking boys. He doesn’t want to send the wrong signal. He doesn’t want to grow up and marry a boy just because he likes boys as friends. A second grade teacher wrote in to Family Focus, a division of Focus on the Family started by James Dobson, and asked “Do you have material on how to explain same-sex marriage vs. traditional marriage to my students? I want them to hear the right perspective when it comes to what they are being taught in public school.” A mother wrote in and asked “What do I say to my children who are exposed to these ideas from all sides?”

          Preston has a good question. He has a strong family unit and a strong church family as well and Preston will wrestle with these issues and find the answers, but many, many children will not be as lucky as Preston. In America today, 1/3 of all children are being raised without a father at home; 11% without a mother. The American family as we know it is disintegrating. Fully 44% of our children will have only one parent to ask. That is a problem bigger than how to answer questions about sexuality and marriage, but that is a sermon for another day.

          What do you say to your children? They are already being exposed to questions that just a few years ago, you would never have dreamed would become part of the vocabulary of our society. The resolution of this issue by the high court is and will continue to impact not only our secular culture, but also our religious culture. Justice Scalia, in his dissent, said that the decision spells the end of democracy as we know it.

          Our secular culture has moved. A considerable portion of our church culture has also moved. It would appear that our little congregation will stand firm that marriage is between a man and a women, relying on bedrock passages of scripture that would seem to yield no other possible interpretation to us. While this is our interpretation based upon what we believe to be the plain language of the Bible, it is not the interpretation applied by many mainline Christian churches in North America.

          I’m not nearly as concerned for the churches of North America as I am for all the boys and girls out there who just want to know how to behave. They have a right to know, don’t you think? And if they have a right to know, they might also want all of us grownups to show them the way and tell them the truth. In light of recent events, those answers may not come as easily as they did not so long ago.

          But there is an answer. It is the same answer that it has always been when it comes to the way and the truth. Our culture may have moved. Our parent church may have moved. But God and the gospel he sent us are timeless and immoveable. I have an answer and so do you. I know the way and I know the truth and so do you. It’s Jesus. Jesus said “I am the way, the truth and the life.” His way was not popular, nor is it easy. But it is the way.

          Well, that’s all well and good, but what do we do with Preston? Does he have to be careful? What do we tell the Prestons of the world about their behavior? What do we tell them about family? We remain Christians dedicated to the core beliefs found in Scripture, but in our application and observance of those beliefs, we practice the Golden Rule. We can allow for the differences of the beliefs of others without falling prey to those beliefs when they clash with our Christian values. We tell them to play with friends, no matter what sex they are. We tell them that we are their family. We show them that the church, just as much as their own flesh and blood, is there for them, that we have time for them, that they can ask anything of us and we will listen and guide…and be guided by the Scriptures that God has given to us to read for ourselves.

          We can do one more thing for Preston and for every youngster who just wants to know. We can hold them and hug them and give them some peace from all the questions they face in a confusing world. How do we do that? We claim the promise of Jesus himself made to his disciples just hours before his arrest and crucifixion. Jesus said: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”

          Jesus spoke to a troubled lot that night and the world in which we live has never found its way to real peace. Now, in the name of individual rights, our country and the North American church finds itself on the horns of yet another controversy, and this time it threatens to shake the unit of family to its very core. What else is new? Is this really so different? Every generation must decide anew whether it will carry that cross or whether it will just give in the demands of society. Christians do not march to the drumbeat of the world. We never have.

          Let not your hearts be troubled. He will give us not only peace; he will even provide the Way.